Push emotion to the side, put on your objective hat and see how many of the following you can honestly say 'yes' to.
If you can't answer 'yes' to the majority of these questions, I'd strongly advise you to give it a bit more time - or rethink entirely. Are you ready?, then let's start.
1. Do your partner makes you feel good about yourself and are you happier since you met them?
2. Are you able to be yourself?
3. Have you seen how they behave in all sorts of different situations: day to day, happy events, under pressure at work or from their family or friends? Did they cope well with these crises?
4. Are you similar in tastes, views, what you like doing?
5. Do you connect on at least three of these crucial connection points: chemistry (you fancy the pants off each other), compatibility (you share similar backgrounds and interests), common goals (you both want the same things from life), pace (you move at the same speed and are both 'fast' or 'slow' people) and timing (you're both ready for commitment)?
6. Do you communicate well (or at least think you'll learn to in time)?
7. Do you trust them to be faithful? If they go out alone or with mates, do they reassure you with details of who they saw, where they went, who they ran into?
8. Do you get on with each other's friends and families? If neither of you can bear each other's significant others, it's not a great sign.
9. Do you both want the same things from life at around the same time? Do you have similar aspirations and thoughts on marriage, kids and the future?
10. Does your gut instinct tell you it's right?
11. Do you like as well as love them?
12. Are they reliable?
13. Do you make decisions together?
14. Have you had a few arguments and happy with how you resolved them? The amount of arguments you're having isn't as relevant as how well you solve them.
15. Are you both able to admit when you're wrong?
16. Are they reasonably sorted psychologically? If they're excessively jealous, overprotective or battling with substance abuse (alcohol or drugs), solve the problem before moving in.
17. Are you both happy with the level of intimacy? Make sure sharing secrets, feelings, desires and anxieties isn't lopsided.
18. Do you laugh together, share the same sense of humour and can laugh at each other and yourselves without getting huffy?
19. Are you compatible sexually? If your libidos don't match, have you worked out a compromise you're both happy with?
20. Are you both happy with the amount of time spent together and apart? Is there a good balance between 'us' and 'me' on both sides?
21. Do you trust each other to keep promises? Not just to be faithful but to be trustworthy with money, stick around during bad times and generally do the right thing?
22. Can you live with each other's faults? Everyone has the odd annoying habit but if it really, really irritates you now, it's only going to get worse once living together.
23. Are you with each other because you want to be, not because you're biological clock is ticking or you're worried no-one else will want you?
Now if your answers are Yes then start your packing in because you both are so contactable together but if you have more than one NO please stay apart until you work on your relationship.
No comments :
Post a Comment